I've almost conquered my first semester back at Sandburg! I'm majoring in vocal performance this year. Surprise surprise... so many years of wrestling God... now I know how in some small way Jacob felt. I love pursuing my passion, knowing it is God's gift for me and His will for my life. This new experience has brought a whole new set of problems. Okay, maybe not problems per se, but more like new... obstacles God has placed before me to teach me to rely on Him. I'm in a very dark place right now to be honest. The cool thing is is that God is with me in this dark place. Sometimes I look around at all of my demons and troubles surrounding me and panic. I frantically grope the floors and desperately grasp the thin air as I blindly search for a way out of the unending darkness, perhaps just a light at the end of this terrifying tunnel would give me hope. Then I turn to Jesus and set my focus on Him, who is the ultimate goal in my life. All of my problems are blocked from view when my sight is set on Jesus. My inner demons will always be bigger, stronger, faster, and smarter than me, but my God will always be bigger, stronger, faster, and smarter than all of my problems and inner demons. I praise God for the deliverance from my past, and praise God for my deliverance in the future.

-2 Corinthians 1:9 "Indeed in our hearts we felt the very sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead."
-Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose"

Ages have passed...

Oh how I've missed my sweet sweet blog! I have been so busy and stressed that I haven't had the energy to blog. I have so much to tell you avid readers! The summer has been packed with awesome God-filled experiences. First was Camp Mahnamahna: I was a counselor for 6th grade girls' cabin. The week was spiritually challenging and I loved it! The energy expelled from these jr. high girls could have powered the city of Chicago for a month... but God gave me endurance to outlast the constant bombardment of hyperactivity! Next was the Cornerstone christian music festival. It was a HUGE blessing to be included in our churches' high school trip! I had the pleasure of hanging with some very close friends, writing some ridiculous songs, and seeing the birth of an awesome band called Captain Chafe! I met some outstanding, strong Christians and grew closer to God every day I attended. Just a side note... I am amazed to see where God has led me in the past year!... Anyway I got to see plenty of awesome bands like Flatfoot 56, Gungor, Anberlin, Anchor and Braille, Luminate, and Seabird. I had the pleasure of meeting some amazing guys who led worship every morning during devotions. Throughout the week God opened my eyes to everything he has in store for my future. I feel God is leading me into some sort of music ministry. So yes. Cornerstone was amazing. And last is Junior High Summer Camp, or SuperCamp! Usually the week builds in intensity toward the Friday night chapel message, but every day God graciously filled the camp with His presence. I saw many young men step up and become young men of God. Many girls renewed their commitment to Christ. God never fails! I organized (yikes) and led worship with some students for the first three days of camp. God sustained me in my disorganized hot mess, and everything went well! One night I attempted singing and playing keyboard at the same time, and I failed epicly. But God once again blessed me that night! In my defeated attitude I sulked to the cabin thinking how terrible sounded. I was so mad at myself for "ruining the worship" and then one of my girls mentioned during a small group discussion how awesome worship was every night because she knew that God was there and could feel His presence. I then began to cry realizing how near-sighted I was toward the awesome power of the Holy Spirit when compared to my abilities. Oh me of little faith! I am so glad God cares enough to discipline me! Otherwise I would be so selfish and spoiled! Well, I've blogged enough for tonight!