Television was (not just) my babysitter

I stared at his dreamy, chiseled, porcelain face in awe. His face was a work of art. His cheekbones could cut diamonds. His piercing eyes could shoot an arrow straight into my heart, and his chin oh boy that chin. In the grand scheme of life, in the glowing tapestry of what I want to be when I grow up, I want to be Conan O'Brien. I want his ginger hair. I want his charming personality. I want his laugh, his humor, and his comedic timing, but most of all, I just want his freaking show. I want to be on television. I want to be the one from which everyone gets news about the president, because let's be honest, no one has the attention span to sit down and watch the news. It's not even funny! Or god forbid read a freaking newspaper. Especially if there aren't any pictures. Forget about it. I want to be a baby sitter's saving grace when the kids won't calm down and she just needs some quiet time while they watch the boob-toob. I want to host Saturday Night Live and have my face streamed across every lap-top in every college student's dorm room in between watching videos of cats and naked Miley Cyrus abusing construction equipment. I want my friends to say "I knew that girl. I made fun of her in high school. I guess I shouldn't have been a huge douche bag because now she's famous, and there is no chance I would be able to ask her for money or even hope to hang out with her. If only I would have seen her for the vibrant, effervescent, and hilarious young woman she really is instead of only seeing her as a 220 lb loser in high school." But I'll be honest, they will never be able to say that because most of them  cannot use words with more than 2 syllables, let alone pronounce the word "effervescent" correctly. It's okay high school friends, I forgive you. To me television is not just a form of entertainment. Television is art. Acting, set design, script writing, production, directing, costumes, makeup, is artistry. And heck, even getting donuts, fetching sparkling water, picking out the brown M&M's of each bowl, and doing other ridiculous things for stuck-up stars and their high-maintenance eating habits (is something I would totally do for someone like Emma Stone although she does not seem like that kind of a person) is artistry. What am I getting at here? Well, crap, I forgot... hold on... I need to read the beginning of this post to see for myself. Oh yeah. Television shows like Sherlock, Community, SNL, The Walking Dead, New Girl, Conan O'Brien, and The Carol Burnett show (I have a thing for redheads) are what inspired me to audition for musicals and pursue theater and even (very) recently decide to minor in theater at Colorado Christian University. I first became interested in these television shows not because they were entertaining or a way to pass the time, but because I could relate to each character. I could see myself in each character, and I didn't feel so abnormal anymore. Jess from New Girl showed me that it's okay to sometimes sing sentences or break into song during a conversation. Sherlock taught me that it's okay to be sociopathic sometimes, as long as you have a Watson around to bring you back to earth and deflate your giant sun sized head around which everything revolves. Once I saw that my differences were often the same differences that made a television character so funny or cool or relatable, I did not feel as much like a weird, selfish, egotistical doofus anymore. Television has inspired me to be that character for another Erin Darling out there in the world who is insecure about who she really is. I want to be the actor that, through their performance, can communicate that just because you are different, quirky, weird, or not accepted by society, YOU ARE NOT ALONE AND IT'S OKAY TO BE YOU. I want to continue to pursue theater and acting after I graduate. I want to show everyone that there are people just like you who struggle day to day externally with others and internally as well through the characters I portray. I want everyone to know that I am one of those people. I am egotistical, spontaneous, annoying, naive, analytical, hyper, weird, and lazy. Television has shown me that I am I am the sidekick, the hero, the villain, the damsel, the old fart, the clueless inspector, the robot, the snot-nosed kid, the cocky dirt-bag, the attractive leading lady, the plaid shirt wearing assistant, the crazy asian, the monkey named Annie's Boobs, the smart old neighbor, and the surprisingly wise janitor. I am me, and I'm not perfect, but I am not alone.